A blonde walks up to a Coke machine and puts in a coin. Out pops
a coke. The blonde looks amazed and runs away to get some more
coins. She returns and starts feeding the machine madly and of
course the machine keeps feeding out drinks. Another person walks up
behind the blonde and watches her antics for a few minutes before
stopping her and asking if someone else could have a chance. The blonde
spins around and shouts in her face: "Can't you see I'm winning??"

__________________________

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of
their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door
open, but they couldn't. The girl with the coat hanger stopped for
a moment to catch her breath, and her friend said anxiously, "Hurry
up! It's starting to rain and we need to put the top up."

______________________

Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to
some tracks. The first blonde said "These look like deer tracks,"
and the other one said, "No, they look like moose tracks." They
argued and argued for awhile and they were still arguing when the
train hit them.

_____________________

A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband
is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun.
The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a
beautiful redhead.
She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps
out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.
Hysterically the blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up.
You're next!"

_______________________

An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant
prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain
showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to
eat, shop and stay overnight.
The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the
day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew
which room she was in at the hotel and called her up to ask what
happened to her. She answered the phone, crying, and said, "I can't
get out of the room!"
"You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked. "Why not?"
She replied, "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is
the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do
Not Disturb!"

_______________________

There are 2 women getting ready to leave for work. The brunette
gets in the driver's seat and the blonde gets in the passenger's
seat. The brunette says, "We're late, so you watch out the back
window for cops." As she speeds down the road she asks the
blonde, "So, do you see any cops?"
The blonde replies, "Yes."
The brunette says, "Are they behind us?"
"Yes."
"Are they close?"
"Yes."
"Are they going to stop us?"
"I don't know."
The brunette says, "Well, are their lights on?"
The blonde replies, "Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No."