Husband & Wife: On marriage and all...


At a silver wedding anniversary the husband was standing in one corner
looking very sad. "What's the matter?" asked his friend. "Well,
a week after marriage, I got fed up and wanted to kill my wife, but my
lawyer said that I would get 25 years. Now I realize that today I would
have been a free man."

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A couple were in bed after celebrating their golden anniversary.
The wife said, "Darling, embrace me the way you used to when we first got
married." He did.
"Now kiss me the way you used to...... Now darling bite me the way you
used to....."
At this point the husband got out of bed and the wife said,
"Where are you going, dear?"
"To get my teeth," the husband replied.

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During their silver anniversary, a wife reminded her husband: Do
you remember when you proposed to me, I was so overwhelmed that I didn't
talk for an hour?"
The hubby replied : "Yes, honey, that was the happiest hour of my life."

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When a bachelor marries, his wife has three qualities - she is an
economist in the kitchen, an aristocrat in the living room and a devil in
bed. After a few years, sure enough the three qualities remain, but not
in the same order - she is an aristocrat in the kitchen, a devil in the
living room and an economist in bed.

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On the first night of their marriage, the groom told the bride,
"Darling, love is blind."
"Yes dear," replied the bride, "but the neighbors are not, so please
close the windows."

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Two friends met. "You look sad, Fred, what's the trouble?" asked the
first friend. "Domestic trouble."
"But you always bragged that your wife is a pearl."
"She still is. It's the mother-of-pearl that makes all the trouble."

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